Hello, I’m a Recovering Worrier

I’ve been sick for about a month now. I’ve had a myriad of symptoms assail my body, the latest of which is loss of smell. This means a loss of taste. This means awfulness! I love to cook and eat, and it’s becoming depressing not being able to smell or taste. I’m praying my bronchitis and sinusitis clears soon; but I realize I’m been battling more than just poor health.

That looks like a good one!

She’s imitating me!

I’m fighting this looming feeling that something greater is wrong with me. That old worry feeling of “The-bronchitis-isn’t-going-away-so-it-must-be-cancer” has resurfaced. I’ve had it before with horrible headaches…”Something worse must be wrong with me!”

I’ve been writing this blog for about 2 years now, and I’m embarrassed to admit that I still have these kinds of worries. I’m a little ashamed that I haven’t kicked the old habit yet.

For sure, my mind doesn’t spin as long on this particular fear and I call on God a little faster than I used to. I also recall God’s presence and reliability more than I have in the past.

But a lie has crept into my mind as I’ve written posts:

I will eventually stop worrying. 

I want this whole worry challenge to just go away. I don’t like it, feel weak with it, and it’s exhausting, sometimes debilitating…even after 2 years of actively struggling against it! And I want it to stop.

But that’s not the way it goes with sin. (I believe unchecked worry is a sin according to Scriptures.) Sin doesn’t stop. We can’t wake up one morning and be in the free and clear of it.

The old nature constantly trails after us, trips us up, and can make life miserable. Absolutely, we can put strategies into place to fight against a particular sin. That’s why I started writing Cast Your Worries. But I don’t believe we will ever fully conquer a sin this side of heaven.

Recovering Worrier

I will never fully defeat worry. My worries will change as I mature, as my kids grow, as more life happens to me. I may barely worry by the time I’m 55! But it will still be there, ready to rear its ugly head the minute I think I’ve put it on the shelf.

My father-in-law counsels with members of AA. He says they refer to themselves as recovering alcoholics. They recognize that they will never be completely free from their addiction…they always have a guard up against the alcohol.

I believe I’m a recovering worrier. Rather than striving to completely eradicate the worry I detest, I choose to call on the God of peace who has conquered all sin in eternity.

It means that while I may never be a perfect, worry free person here on earth, I will see a day when my heart is completely free of this disease called sin.

In the meantime, I need my Savior everyday to forgive me for my fears and distrust. He needs to be working in every part of my life, because I cannot over come. Praise God He’s willing to take me back, even after the 114th time of worrying about cancer. And hallelujah that He does that for any sin I confess!

Do you feel like you can completely conquer a particular sin?

Happily linked with:
Raising Homemakers
A Wise Woman Builds Her Home
Grace and Truth
A Little R & R
Messy Marriages
3-D Lessons for Life
Pat and Candy

 

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7 thoughts on “Hello, I’m a Recovering Worrier

  1. I loved this post! It encouraged me so very much, and it gave me a new perspective on what it means to fight sin. I always get so discouraged when I have been fighting the same sin for so long and then I just completely slip. I feel like a failure and sometimes like it’s not worth trying that hard again, but this reminder is so powerful. Fighting sin and constantly asking God for help and forgiveness is just what this life looks like. And God has told us that someday we will be free of the struggle forever. Thank you so much : )

    • I’m so happy God was able to comfort you with His promise of forgiveness! And you’re so right that this is the Christian life – it’s not one of perfection, but one of dependence on Christ. Bless you as you continue to sin…and call on our Savior 🙂

  2. This post was exactly what I needed to read as I lie awake worrying about EVERYTHING at 3 in the morning. Praise God for you Brandy!

    • Praying for you that you can put your fears to bed and rest! I hate those middle of the night worries. It’s the perfect time though to call on God to calm your heart and be God of every. single. worry. Rest friend!

  3. Thank you for being honest and transparent about the sin of worry. My pastor preached on this very recently, pointing out that worry is considered a “respectable sin.” But since its roots are unbelief and a desire for control, worry is a damaging and ungodly sin, indeed. BUT there is hope for worriers, just like there’s hope for all sinners, in the cross of Jesus Christ! Praying right now that you would experience His victory over worry. Thank you for linking up and sharing your wisdom with us at Grace & Truth!

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